dapleb
It's A Joke
444
79812
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
It's A Joke
My wife caught me on the bathroom scales sucking in my stomach. She laughed "ha that's not going to help".



"Sure it does" I said. "It's the only way I can see the numbers".
Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.
Went for a stroll on the nudie beach and saw a gorgeous, tall blonde strutting about with her friends. Obviously, I walked up to her and started chatting her up. 

 

She was shocked over my boldness, looked me up and down several times and finally said, rather icily, "And who, exactly, do you think you can satisfy with that tiny little thing?"

 

i looked her straight in the eye, grinned and said: "Me."

2002 TDM 900 Red/Yellow Cocktail (it's yellow)., biggified some
My friend Tony asked me not to say his name backwards



I said y not?
Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.
Someone tried to sell me a coffin today.



I said that's the last thing I need.
Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.
T-shirt is actually short for tyrannosaurus shirt.



It's because of the short arms.
Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.
my girlfriend tried to excite me with her key ring



I think she was trying to fob me off

"As I Lay Rubber down to street, I pray for traction I can keep. But if I skid and begin to slide, please dear god protect my ride"

Mods; Oil pressure switch, neoprene rear inner mudguard, scottoiler, highway pegs,  fenda extenda, 1999 carbs and airbox, Kais suspension setup, later clutch springs, LED lamps, Metmachex swingarm, Hagon Shock, Oxford heated grips, 4 way fused accessory Bus, 17" 3CV front wheel, Michellin R6 tyres, GPS speedo, 5' ignition advance.
I like my women like i like my coffee.

 

Often drunk in the morning....

Current toys: '99 XT600E, 2000 4TX, '82 Princess 30DS (where the username comes from), No longer a '03 Fazer thou.

Save the planet, it's the only one with beer!
If 666 is all evil, then 25.8069758 is the root of all evil.
Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.
My wife said "what starts with an F and ends in a K".



I said "no it doesn't"
Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.
There are 10 types of people.  Those who understand binary an those who don't

 

There are 2 type of people.  Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.

 

 

 

Quote:Went for a stroll on the nudie beach and saw a gorgeous, tall blonde strutting about with her friends. Obviously, I walked up to her and started chatting her up. 

 

She was shocked over my boldness, looked me up and down several times and finally said, rather icily, "And who, exactly, do you think you can satisfy with that tiny little thing?"

 

i looked her straight in the eye, grinned and said: "Me."
 

I live near a nudist beach, being able to touch your nipples to your knees doesn't necessarily require flexibility  :blink:  

1992 Mk1, 76k miles, Hagon springs, MTC exhaust, 4½ gears Gone now Sad

2009 900 abs, 42k miles, Yamaha heated grips, double bubble screen, R&G crash bungs, scottoiler, Autocom, 1500 lumen LED spotlights.



[Image: post-1-1152402501.jpg][Image: post-1-1150550726.gif][Image: post-1-1150559830.gif]
Quote:There are 10 types of people.  Those who understand binary an those who don't

 

There are 2 type of people.  Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.

 
Joke is a bit of an exaggeration...but...



[attachment=o14800]
Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.
What's the difference between a cavalry charger and a brewery horse? One darts into the fray....

2004 900 - Blue with lots of goodies

2012 900 - Still adding shiny bits. Was black, changed to white and now back to black again.

 
√-1  2<sup>3 </sup> Σπ

1992 Mk1, 76k miles, Hagon springs, MTC exhaust, 4½ gears Gone now Sad

2009 900 abs, 42k miles, Yamaha heated grips, double bubble screen, R&G crash bungs, scottoiler, Autocom, 1500 lumen LED spotlights.



[Image: post-1-1152402501.jpg][Image: post-1-1150550726.gif][Image: post-1-1150559830.gif]
I'm clearly nowhere near clever enough for this stuff. Huh

Current toys: '99 XT600E, 2000 4TX, '82 Princess 30DS (where the username comes from), No longer a '03 Fazer thou.

Save the planet, it's the only one with beer!
Quote:√-1  2<sup>3 </sup> 
Σ
π


(θ‿θ)

Bet ewe didn't save me any. Oi loike π
Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.
Saved by google, clever gits! Lol

Current toys: '99 XT600E, 2000 4TX, '82 Princess 30DS (where the username comes from), No longer a '03 Fazer thou.

Save the planet, it's the only one with beer!
Marriage is like a game of cards.

You start out with two hearts and a diamond and end up wishing you had a club and a spade.
Current toys: '99 XT600E, 2000 4TX, '82 Princess 30DS (where the username comes from), No longer a '03 Fazer thou.

Save the planet, it's the only one with beer!
Lolzio



I asked my wife if I was the only one she had been with.



She said yes, all the others have been nines and tens.
Doin valve clearances? Use dappers valve shim exchange program and the job will be carroty - Free (other than you postin me yer shims) for sporting members.
lol
Quote:Lolzio



I asked my wife if I was the only one she had been with.



She said yes, all the others have been nines and tens.
 

Oh your worth a ten in my book  :giveusahug:
Bigred mk1 R1 Calipers- Braided lines- Givi wing rack-Crash bungs- Hi vis bullets-PR2's- and a hoot to ride.



Quad 900 Silver Laser duo tech pipes-Scott oiler-Engine crash bars- Radiator mounted see me ring LED's-Datatool system 3 alarm -Centre stand- Extender fender-Renthal bars-Handle bar risers-Mirror extenders-BMW GS Handgaurds-Acumen uprated horn & Nautilus-Stainless steel Radiator guard-Givi wing rack-OEM screen-Yammy touring screen-MRA Vario-MRA Double bubble cut down for fast as fk riding-Tiger screen-Tank protector-Stomp grip panels-Optimate lead   Gone to Heaven 
Confusedorry:
 

 

1991 MK1 in need of some TLC watch this space   Smile Sorted and on the Road Mick  Tongue  Tongue it's the bike that Jack built  Wink Gone to Heaven  Wub
 


 


Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread:
1 Guest(s)