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An Australian View Of English Cricket. - chrislarkin - 08-01-2014

My mate in Brisbane sent me this today.

 

<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">Q. What do you get if you cross the English cricket team with an OXO cube?


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>A. A laughing stock.


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">> 


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>Q What is the height of optimism?


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>A: English batsman putting on sunscreen.


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">> 


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>Q. What is the difference between an English batsman and a Formula 1


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>car at


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">high speed?


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>A. Nothing! If you blink you will miss them both.


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">> 


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>Q. What do English batsmen and drug addicts have in common?


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>A. Both spend most of their time wondering where their next score will


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">come from.


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">> 


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>Q. What does an English batsman who is playing in The Ashes have in


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>common


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">with Michael Jackson?


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>A. They both wore gloves for no apparent reason.


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">> 


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>Q. What is the difference between Cinderella and the Pommy cricket team?


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>A. Cinderella knew when to leave the ball.


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">> 


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>Q. What's the difference between the Pommy cricket team and a funeral


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">director?


<p class="" style="color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Calibri;font-size:16px;">>A. A funeral director isn't going to lose the ashes




An Australian View Of English Cricket. - frenchypilot - 08-01-2014

Ask your Aussie mate ..if he's ever heard of match fixing......just think about it they thrashed the Aussies a few months ago & now look whats happened . I bet a lot of people lost a lot of money.



An Australian View Of English Cricket. - dapleb - 08-01-2014

Quote:<p style="font-family:Calibri;color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:16px;">>Q. What does an English batsman who is playing in The Ashes have in


<p style="font-family:Calibri;color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:16px;">>common


<p style="font-family:Calibri;color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:16px;">with Michael Jackson?


<p style="font-family:Calibri;color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:16px;">>A. They both wore gloves for no apparent reason.
<p style="font-family:Calibri;color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:16px;"> 

<p style="font-family:Calibri;color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:16px;">I think Michael Jackson probably wore gloves for a very apparent reason.  Smile 


<p style="font-family:Calibri;color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:16px;"> 

<p style="font-family:Calibri;color:rgb(0,0,0);font-size:16px;">Never got cricket.....get different scores and call it a draw! Huh  



An Australian View Of English Cricket. - TDMTAM - 09-01-2014

Q. Whats Cricket??????

A. !

Tam

An Australian View Of English Cricket. - ChrisG - 09-01-2014

Quote:Never got cricket.....get different scores and call it a draw! Huh  
Especially when it takes 5 days, everything that happens can be show in a half hour highlights programme, and they still manage a draw!

An Australian View Of English Cricket. - Studley Ramrod - 09-01-2014

And if it rains, they all finish 'playing' to save getting their hair wet, and call it a draw.  Reminds me of when I played sports at junior school.  Rolleyes