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It's A Joke - Printable Version

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It's A Joke - Snowbird - 31-03-2022

I found a £20 note on the floor in tescos today and as I picked it up an old woman looked sternly at me and said "what would jesus do?" accusingly.

 

So I turned it into wine.... :drinks:




It's A Joke - dapleb - 01-04-2022

Lolzio







190 years ago everybody rode horses around and only the wealthy could afford cars.



Today everybody drives cars and only the wealthy can afford horses.



Oh how the stables have turned!


It's A Joke - dapleb - 02-04-2022

I told my friend I had built a model of the Himalayas.



He asked "to scale".



I said "no, just to look at".


It's A Joke - dapleb - 03-04-2022

I never thought orthopedic shoes would work for me.



But I stand corrected.


It's A Joke - dablik - 03-04-2022

Why was six afraid of seven ? cos seven eight nine


My IQ test came back.

 

It was negative

 

 

It's true  Smile




It's A Joke - Snowbird - 03-04-2022

Quote: 

My IQ test came back.

 

It was negative

 

 

It's true  Smile
:rotflmmfao:  I know the feeling.

 



It's A Joke - Studley Ramrod - 03-04-2022

Lol




It's A Joke - dapleb - 05-04-2022

I accidentally gave my wife a glue stick instead of her lipstick.



She still isn't talking to me.


It's A Joke - Norwegian - 05-04-2022

Saw the 1% milk in the fridge today. Must recharge.


It's A Joke - dapleb - 06-04-2022

My maths teacher called me average..



How mean.


It's A Joke - alanfavell - 06-04-2022

Hydrogen atom #1- I've lost an electron!

 

Hydrogen atom #2 - Are you sure?

 

Hydrogen atom #1 -Yes, I'm positive

 

 

Got my coat n off to the Large Hadron kaleidoscope ......



Isaac Newton died a virgin, which means I have a one-up on one of history’s greatest scientific genuises
<div>Because I’m not dead.
</div>


It's A Joke - dapleb - 07-04-2022

Lolzio



Someone said my dads gay and I'm now trying to work out which one.


It's A Joke - dapleb - 09-04-2022

What does IDK stand for?



I've asked loads of people and no one seems to know.


It's A Joke - dapleb - 10-04-2022

Scientists are studying the effect of cannabis on sea birds.





They've left no tern unstoned.


It's A Joke - Snowbird - 10-04-2022

:rotflmmfao: :rotflmmfao:




It's A Joke - Studley Ramrod - 10-04-2022

Lol




It's A Joke - dapleb - 11-04-2022

Yesterday a clown held a door open for me.



I thought it was a nice jester.


It's A Joke - Snowbird - 11-04-2022

Bought an occasional table the other day, still not worked out what it's meant to be the rest of the time.




It's A Joke - dapleb - 12-04-2022

I'm not a fan of elevator music.



It's bad on so many levels.


It's A Joke - dapleb - 13-04-2022

Someone asked me to name two structures that hold water.



I was like well damn.